I appreciate you, woman

Posted: August 10, 2009 in Uncategorized

So, in the spirit of making the weekly hell that is Monday a little more bearable, and taking a little of the edge off what people are chronically doing wrong in dating, why they’re miserable and alone, and how they’re so intolerable that no one would want to be with them, I’ve decided it’s time for Appreciation Mondays. Today is the one day of the week we’ll take time off from eviscerating you people for your own self-defeating incompetence and show you how much we really love you. So here are some people I’d like to send out some love and appreciation to:

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1. Sexy Female Bloggers. The Black Weblog Awards may not have given y’all any love, but I will. Y’all are some of the funniest, most interesting, and inspirational people I know (or e-know). Your wit, strenghth, and thoughtfulness makes every day a better day than it would be without your words of wisdom (even when you’re dead ass wrong and I call you on it.) Also, some of y’all are just fine, period. And there’s a little that makes a man smile more and dig into his wallet to buy you an Extra Value meal more than a fine ol’ lady who can think gud. And your appreciation and support of the mediocre work we do over here at B St. Arruh industries has really made me feel good. So thank you. This isn’t a full list, just some of my faves. Ladies, I appreciate you:

Blackie Collins





DC Dating Diva

2. Bougie Black Chicks Look, baby, I know you get a lot of grief. The white man’s holding you down at work. Other chicks stay hating on you in the club. Men don’t treat you like the queens you are because we think you don’t need us. And we know deep down you do. It’s just sometimes you act like you don’t for so long, we go against our better instincts and drink the kool-aid you made for yourself. I know behind those big bug eye shades and that designer purse with the logos all over it, all you really want is to be loved and cherished. We know that you pretend to be deep in your blackberry because you don’t want to face the hurt and disrespect of the catcalls and the inappropriate holler. And I know life has made you a little harder than you want to be. So I just wan you to know we appreciate you for sticking it out. We appreciate and admire the way you put on that skirtsuit everyday and work like a dog for that paycheck. And we appreciate the way your booty looks in it too. I love how when you get home, you can talk with us as equals about politics, sports, and what happened on True Blood the other night. I know a lot of folks think you should get off your high horse, but quietly, and don’t tell no one I said this, you make us want to work harder, be stronger, and be a better man so we can provide for, cherish and love you.

3. Earthy Weird chick Hey different ass chick. Have I told you recently how sexy I think your weird hair is? How exciting it is to spend time with someone who has a point of view? To feel like I’m free and can be myself because you’re so understanding and comfortable with yourself. I like the way you look at life as how it could be, and not just the drudgery that it sometimes is. I’m even getting ok with going to those weird art shows of uyours, and while I don’t really think your musician friends are that good, when you break out some of that amazing Canadian weed of yours, it sounds like heaven just cause I’m sitting here with you. I like that when you get drunk, you want to find a chick we can have a threesome with, and I appreciate that you’re an ass woman, just like me. I think the clothes you wear are really cool, and I like how even though your income is sketchy at best, you’re always willing to share your last piece of cocoa bread.

4. Girl who hooks me up with an extra thigh at Popeyes I love how you look around to make sure your manager’s not watching and slip in that 4th piece when I only paid for three. I like how you knowingly look in my eyes while you’re doing it. We black folks don’t show each other enough love too much of the time, but you’re doing your part to correct that, one piece of juicy dark meat at a time. And that’s why I keep coming back to you girl.

If you want to shout anyone today, please let em know how much you appreciate ’em in the comments.

  1. Reina says:

    Awww. *blushes* Thank you, sir.

  2. b. collins says:

    In a world where everyone hates mondays, you just made me love them a bit more…

  3. 8th Wonder says:

    This was great!

  4. The Lioness says:

    LOL- hilarious especially #4 because people underestimate the value of a good hookup these days.

    I appreciate the women who still snatch their bad behind kids up when they are acting the fool in the store. Parenting a la negative reinforcement- it makes me tingle inside. You rarely see that anymore.

  5. The Sphinx says:

    Hey! I think you forgot Pass Me a Shovel! :-p
    lol you can add us next time đŸ™‚ thanks for this “appreciation” post though.

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