Posts Tagged ‘national geographic titties’

Click picture to take the quiz

Click picture to take the quiz

So I’m in NY with two of my female besties walking around after a long day of day drinking. I highly recommend the lobby at the Parker Meridien. That place is like the Royal Tenembaums movie come to life. Weird, weird people with lots of money and deep fried olives. Also, the W on Lexington Avenue has a Sunday party in one of their suites. It was kind of blah when we went, but it was the first one, so I expect it’s just growing pains. Get on the list. In any case, so we walk by the NBC shop, and see that they’re selling t-shirts with “That’s a dealbreaker, ladies!” printed on them. If you watch 30 Rock, you get it, if you don’t , I won’t bother to explain. But this of course led to a discussion of what our personal dealbreakers were. One of the girls is in the midst of a divorce process right now so she’s uniquely qualified to comment. Here’s their rundown as I remember it.

Women’s Dealbeakers:

-Neck Tattoos

-Overly Thirsty

-No ambition

-Over 30 and work in retail

-More than one kid from a baby mama (wife ok)

-Possessive

There are more, but the cocktails had started to kick in by then so I don’t remember them all. Which led me to think about my dealbreakers. So here’s a brief list

Physical dealbreakers:

-Neck tattoos

-Really bad skin

-National Geographic Titties

So I could give those titties 4 thumbs down!

So I could give those titties 4 thumbs down!

-N’assatal

Personality Dealbreakers

-Unkind

-No sense of humor

-Takes themselves too seriously

-Takes what other people think too seriously

Concurrently, I just noticed Belle is doing a blog on settling. Which does beg the question, how reasonable are most people’s dealbreakers?  How reasonable are some of mine? I mean, what if I meat an artist who has a neck tat? And she’s really successful and good at what she does, so it’s not like her neck tat is hlding back her career. Do I throw her back into the bin because she’ll look out of place at cocktail parties? Or what if I fall in love with an Indian girl? While I think there are some really attractive Indian and Asian women, and they tend to be very well educated and wordly, that n’assatall is a pandemic in that part of the world. Like Swine Flu or something. I really don’t know that I can bend on the personality dealbreakers but that’s what it is.

And what about people who have unreasoanabel dealbreakers. Girls 4’11” who won’t date a guy who’s not 6’2″? Or guys who only date women who pass the Yung Berg Pool test? Fat people who would only date skinny people? At what point do we let people have their preferences and when do we just slap them about the fat meat on their neck and tell them to get reasonable? What are your dealbreakers, folks? And would you bend on them for someone who met all your other criteria? I heard once that the great things in your life aren’t a product of the rules, but rather, the exceptions. I think I might agree.

Faithfully yours

Brandon St. Randy