8 Reasons to Date a White Woman (The Remix)

The pic from the blog. Look at sad ass buddy in the back while Darth Whitey takes his woman. And probably his farmland too.

The following article written by one LaShaun Williams was posted on a website called Madame Noire yesterday. Like all the bad things in the world, this was brought to my attention by the twitter. Here’s the link (It doesn’t appear on the home page anymore, undoubtedly because of the response, and the front page of the article gives an error message but this still might work. )

Read Madame Noire article here

Text:

I am married to a Black man—dark-skinned, 100 percent cocoa. To me, there is nothing more physically beautiful on this earth. Notice I said physically. Outside of that, there are plenty of more financially, intellectually and emotionally stable options. It’s time to taste the unknown. There are just too many—too many bright and beautiful single Black women waiting for their Black prince charming, only to see more and more of them riding off with their porcelain-skinned beauties.

My question is what are you waiting for—a baby and no ring? Black men are obviously seeing a lot in others they like. As an open-minded woman, I can tell you from experience some things about white are right. In no particular order, here are the reasons you should be giving vanilla a chance.

1. They open wide instead of down low

Gay White men tend to be more forthcoming about their sexuality with family and friends. The down low phenomenon is less prevalent, which preserves the battery usage on your gaydar and relieves the stress of dissecting every male relationship.

2. Not looking for someone to take care of them

Thanks to the absence of family, fathers and marriage in the Black community, a great number of our men have backward expectations when it comes to romantic relationships. A higher percentage of White men come from stronger family structures and more traditional gender roles, where the men seek to care for the women.

3. Attend and graduate from college

Black women are graduating from college and Black men continue to drop out. As a result, degrees become intimidating when dating Black men. In White culture, education is valued and expected. Thus, White men have no problem dating educated women with advanced degrees. It is impressive rather than intimidating.

4. At least attempt to marry before making babies

For whatever reason, White men just don’t have children sprinkled all over the world like Black men. And, if they do, most of them were married to the mother at some point. Sure, they divorce but you can only divorce if you at least attempt a marriage.

5. They don’t glamourize ignorance

They may listen to rap music, but they are smart enough not to act it out. The “thug life” is not something to be aspired. White men have a firmer grasp on what really defines manhood.

6. Financial planning and stability

Black people, especially men, are always trying to shine—often spending more money than they have. White men tend to be more educated in the area of finance with a greater understanding of retirement planning, savings, investments, etc. This is mostly due to a higher level of exposure and teaching, but all that matters is they know and make better decisions than Black men when it comes to managing money.

7. Have the ability to look beyond your past

Ever wonder why White people can date the friends of exes and so on? It’s because they don’t let the past hinder the present. Promiscuous Black men think they deserve to settle down with virgins, and allow past relationships to haunt the present. Not White men. They have no problem turning a hoe into a housewife.

8. Don’t take everything as a challenge to their masculinity

Intimidation and insecurity are two reasons for the rift between Black men and women. As a result of their insecurities and low self-esteem, Black men are intimidated by the strength of an educated and ambitious Black woman. Rather than seeing her as a strong teammate, she is a threat to their manhood. Thus, they feel the need to overcompensate. White men, on the other hand, are more secure. What Black men see as threatening is what makes a great wife and business partner to them.

Fair enough. Everyone knows the negro male is a degenerate. Not worth anyone’s time, really. Fortunately for us, you black women ain’t shit either. Allow me to show you eight ways why White Women are clearly your superiors.

1. They open wide. And swallow

Unlike you non dick-sucking black women, the white woman will take cock to the face like a porn star. While you reserve your dry and toothy head for birthdays and anniversaries, she’s ready to slurp up that baby gravy on demand.

Ma, I been hugging the block...hustling rock..

2. They ain’t fat like y’all!

Erbody know all black women are fat. All of em. And if they ain’t fat now, they’re one donut away. Not like the nice white woman, who’s always in the gym, making sure to keep that ass curve free. Smelling like delicious pine-sol and granola chips. mmmhhhh.

Nice Svelte Norweigan Goddesses

3. They’re classy!

Unlike you ghetto trash, the white woman knows how to act in public. She’s genteel, kind, and not a criminal like you all. She doesn’t sit around smoking Newports and eating chicken boxes all day:

Shouts to LiLo

4. They love black people!

Unlike you ungrateful, self-loathing no good so and so’s, the white woman has a great big heart that seeks to heal divides and create peace. She would never do no shit like throwing acid on herself and saying a darkie did it

Um, the suspect? Black between 150 and 300 lbs. definitely black though. maybe 4'11"-7'3", in that range somewhere?

5. Their white male friends do too!

I love you porch mo...uh porch monsoons. I love porch monsoons. Except for those jewish ones. Don't much care for them

6. They go to Good White Schools for book learning!

Always tryna be liek the white woman and go to school. SMH

7. They ain’t Gold-diggers like y’all!

Always trying to take what little a brother has. A white woman would never date someone just cause they’re rich or an athlete, bless their pure hearts.

8. And most of all, they got nice pretty shapes!

Unlike you horrible black women with your big old butts

Ionno if that's a man or a woman, but I like it!

*If perhaps you’re a total idiot, I’ll note for you that this post is what we call sarcasm. Lookit. I don’t have a problem with black women dating outside the race. I don’t even have a problem with black women encouraging other black women to date outside the race. Do you. But why it seems like every proponent of interracial dating for black women seems to want to do it by denigrating and stereotyping black men is beyond me. No one needs you to justify your choices in love. Unless you yourself aren’t comfortable with them. If so, that’s your problem. But keep my mothafucking name out of your mouth while you’re doing it.